Mike Francis Improv Comedy Scripts
#2-12 Saddleworth Business Centre, Delph, Saddleworth OL3 5DH


Would you like to know more about my new book?
Then this is the script for you!

Supplied digitally as a typewritten script in PDF format. This can be manipulated to any design required in MS Word including a page to view on your phone or tablet.

How do you get a girlfriend? What do you say to a girl? Ice Breakers? Compliments? Learn from a professional entertainer, we ALWAYS get the girl without using cheesy chat up lines and internet trolled pick up nonsense.


“I've always been a bit shy around women. Your simple tips and and a few lines changed everything for me. Not only did I pull a girl on the first night I tried, but I've also been promoted at work because of my new outgoing confidence level..."
Paul F. London.

"Make a girl laugh and you can make her do anything"
Marilyn Monroe

Ever walked down the street and seen a super-sexy woman with an ugly little troll? Well, I’m afraid to say that’s me....Not the super-sexy woman, but the troll!

Ok, I’m not quite that bad, but I’m short, I’m tubby, I have a receding hairline and although I’m not an absolute horror, I’m far from Brad Pitt! However, if you saw my fiancé, you simply wouldn’t believe that she would have anything to do with me! She’s tall, sexy, a model and she adores the ground I walk on!

I actually recently bumped into an old school friend who I haven’t seen for many years while at a bar. We chatted about the normal stuff, where we worked, what we were doing with our lives and of course the inevitable discussion of whether we had wives or children yet. I happened to be with my fiancé that night who was standing over in another corner of the bar talking to a friend and I pointed her out, “that’s my fiancé over there”. My old school mate simply laughed and said, “You wish!”. Of course, I was actually telling the truth!

So how did I do it?
Well, you could wrongly assume that I am hung like a donkey and go like a steam train. Unfortunately for both me and my fiancé, I am neither. However, I realised pretty early in life that there were two types of men that always had a stunner on their arms. The first were super-good looking hunks who lived in the gym, and the other type were normal-looking guys who seemed to have a bit of banter.

Knowing that I would never be the hunk, I opted to develop banter and use it to pull women.

Now stop right there – I know what you’re thinking.
You’re thinking one of the following things:

“I’ve seen my mate try a bit of banter and use one-liners and all he ever gets is a slap round the face!”


“I’ve never been good at talking to women in the first place, let alone start cracking jokes!”

Am I right?

Of course I am. Well, let me say this – If you have a mate who constantly gets knocked back and slapped round the face then they simply aren’t using the right roasts and one liner’s and maybe you should get them to check “Chat Up” out themselves!

However, I bet you also have a pretty average looking mate who always seems to do well with the girls, and, if you’re the sort of guy who’s a bit shy or worried about even talking to girls in the first place, then don’t worry because that was me too!

This package of one liners, jokes, and pulling lines will instantly give you the confidence to successfully open a conversation with some of the sexiest girls that you can see in the club!

Now let me explain something...

This book of lines does really work miracles and it turned my life with women around as it was indeed a line in this very 'script' that got me on the road to happiness with my fiancé.

However, understand that even Brad Pitt didn't pull every single girl he spoke to! But what this book does is give you the weapons to open conversations with girls where previously you would have been too shy, scared, of simply would have made yourself look an idiot or dropped yourself right in the middle of a tumbleweed moment!

What you have to understand is something very simple:

Women are different to guys – Guys are very much more looks-oriented whereas girls are turned on by personality and charm!

Now of course, as we discussed earlier, women do go after looks too. So, if you’re good looking you instantly have something to keep a woman interested. However, whereas many men would go home with a sexy looking woman with no personality, few women would do the same with a good looking man!

The point is that just because you’re not good looking doesn’t mean you don’t have a chance. But you have to show who you’ve targeted that you have a bit of charm and get them talking! As a now-expert, I now call this “opening” and it is essential that you have the right lines to do so...